about only porn & skin sites? He hides his porn, gets update messages, doesn't make love, wants me to initiate always & is one of those lay there & do nothing guys while you do all the work. Yet he treats me like a queen otherwise. He doesn't go out- just goes to internet skin sites- may be doing some online dating???? Now gets violent when I bring the hiding up. But doesn't hit me- just tears up stuff. I am fed up as a woman & frustrated. We have been married for over 19 years. I am not unattractive or a prude. I have been very patient. But.......now what? Does anyone know what the sassy connection is? It seems to be a private connection. He claims though it is on his computer that he doesn't ???? He is being a #1 jerk. and AAA h***o. Right now I am elsewhere and not home. Not in a hurry to go back. Is he hopeless? I have prayed for answers- tried to talk to him & he only says he is doing nothing!!!????? I don't want to live like this.
I thank you for all your answers. They are all good. He says he wants to stop & will see someone about it. I pray so for the sake of all of us.

My suggestion.. take the DVD players, VCR's, and computer out of your home. Get a PO Box for your mail so you can check what is coming in.
If he gets pissed he has a problem. Ask him to get help, if he don't then tell him to get lost.
it is an addiction and he will need help!

Keep on moving...he isn't going to change. He has an addiction and the fact that he doesn't see what it's doing to the relationship, just confirms this.

Then don't live like that. If he prefers some magazine or movie than the real mccoy then go on without him.

I have to agree with Valerie. Porn is a big problem. How someone can choose porn on a computer over a real live person, that they are suppose to love is beyond me. Sure every guy looks at porn once in a while. But he sounds like he has a serious problem. You need to tell him it is time to choose. You deserve better than play second string to computer porn.